Christmas Record

by dan bryk

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1.
When I saw you in late August It already felt like fall You were crying in the Starbucks At the Crabtree Mall I thought about you 'til November Then I finally picked up the phone You said I was really sweet to care But it was time for you to be alone Don't you know that I adore you But all I seem to do is bore you So please let me implore you To Love me for Christmas Love me for Christmas Love me for Christmas Love me for Christmas Love me for Christmas Love me for Christmas Well I've had some lousy holidays But this one takes the cake All the gestures are empty All the decorations are fake I always knew he didn't love you Even though he tried to care Now you're gonna go and treat me Like I'm not even there You could try to get to know me Instead of blowing me off so phony Make this Christmas that less lonely If you Love me for Christmas Love me for Christmas Love me for Christmas Love me for Christmas Love me for Christmas Love me for Christmas Well I hear the bells are ringing And little children singing Their stupid songs Now the Northern wind is blowing And my heart is cold as stone So I guess I should be going Merry Christmas Please leave me alone So I'll wish you a Merry Christmas Before I end this sad existence Cause You won't love me for Christmas Love me for Christmas You won't love me for Christmas Love me for Christmas You won't love me for Christmas Love me for Christmas Why won't you love me for Christmas? Love me for Christmas Love me for Christmas Why won't you love me for Please could you love me for Christmas? Love me for Christmas
2.
They couldn't hear a thing Mudpack face and slippers Seemed so faintly undisturbed So many things said without a word And those cozy christmas evenings are gone forever And those cozy christmas evenings are gone forever I'm six weeks overdue And i'm already over you dear He simply sat around and nodded And the TV girl said "abortion is a sin" And those cozy christmas evenings are gone forever And those cozy christmas evenings are gone forever Mouths aren't rational Mouths need feeding And when the system screws you Mouths get desperate And those cozy christmas evenings are gone forever And those cozy christmas evenings are gone forever And as people made their way to Walmart on a Wednesday She said "if the pastor buys the Pampers Then the pastor can welcome me into his herd" And those cozy christmas evenings are gone forever And those cozy christmas evenings are gone forever
3.
We both woke up on Christmas morn In separate beds across the hall My parents' house, my mother's laws We couldn't wait until tomorrow The bumper hanging in the snow My dad asked, "Sure you have to go?" And mom said, "See, I told you so You should've rented a U-Haul" By 12 o'clock, we hit the road Our stomachs full, a heavy load Our chariot a V-8 Ford It would be a great adventure In Buffalo we were stopped and stared at The customs man said, "Pull over there" I brushed your cheek, you stroked my hair As we waited for an eternity They called our names through the speaker buzz And asked us what our purpose was For crossing the border like Santa Claus Were we trying to pull a fast one? They asked you all about your new job One played good cop, one took notes They emptied the car and searched for drugs Or whatever it was they were looking for And left it all piled up beside the trunk And wished us good luck With Canada in our rearview mirror And Christmas carols on the stereo The snow fell hard, the road went clear Black ice, our Christmas miracle We crawled along the thruway ride The snow was rising on each side The windshield wipers kept the time To the Yobs and "Feliz Navidad" We pulled into a Cracker Barrel Hardly gay in our apparel The waitress said, "My name is Cheryl. Take your time. It looks rough out there." You look like you're on some kind of great adventure" You said you'd like the veggie plate I ordered chicken deep-fried steak You gave me a look, I said, "Give me a break It's my first meal in America" The muffler fell off the back of the car 'round Clarksburg, West Virginia You held my hand and we tried to laugh But we couldn't hear much after that 79 is a boring drive I'd hardly know you were alive Without you snoring by my side And missing the great adventure Missing the great adventure Uh-huh The Citgo sign said 24 hours I bought Perrier and pecan turtles And wilting red gas station flowers You said, "Now, that's romantic" We stopped at 12 at Motel 8 The only place that looked open late They have HBO won't that be great? We fell asleep in the first five minutes of The Sopranos We woke up in each other's arms We kissed then lost a couple hours And then we tried to find our clothes All scrunched up in the covers We thought that was a pretty good start To our great adventure My dad said, "Take Highway 19, son It'll shave two hours off Charleston But in Summersville remember to slow down That speed trap is the absolute worst" You said, "Slow down, we're making time There isn't any finish line" I said, "We're only doing 55" That's when the flashing lights came up behind us The cop sauntered up to the window Said, "65 in a 50 zone" I said, "There's no way You must have the wrong car in your radar" We left $200 lighter On our great adventure She yelled, "Stop," I tried to brake The swerve part was a bad mistake Whatever we hit I heard it break Soon we both started crying Finally we turned around And drove the half an hour down To lay that turtle in the ground But we didn't have a shovel or anything Through the tunnel, 'round the mountains Up and down to Winston-Salem On the edge of Greensboro We caught some college radio But they never said What those songs were The sign said 12 miles to Chapel Hill She smiled and leaned on the windowsill The rental place was nice but still We had to get some groceries We fought over the price of ham And Bounty versus the Kroger brand In the checkout line We wondered could we stand each other's company We cuddled up in front of the TV And ate our ham and cranberry On brown bread with a slice of cheese And retired to the bedroom And that was only the very start Of our very long And very wonderful Very great adventure
4.
Hey, maybe I'll cut my hair Maybe I'll move somewhere Maybe I'll get a car Maybe I'll drive so far they'll all lose track Me, I'll bounce right back Maybe I'll sleep in late Maybe I'll lose some weight Maybe I'll clear my junk Maybe I'll just get drunk on berry wine Me, I'll be just Fine and dandy Lord, it's like a hard candy Christmas I'm barely getting through tomorrow But still I won't let Sorrow bring me way down Hey, maybe I'll learn to code Maybe I'll just lie low Maybe I'll hit the bars Maybe I'll count the stars until dawn Me, I will go on Maybe I'll settle down Maybe I'll just leave town Maybe I'll have some fun Maybe I'll meet someone and make him mine Me, I'll be just Fine and dandy Lord, it's like a hard candy Christmas I'm barely getting through tomorrow But still I won't let Sorrow bring me way down Yeah I'll be fine and dandy Lord, it's like a hard candy Christmas I'm barely getting through tomorrow But still I won't let Sorrow bring me way down 'Cause I'll be fine Yeah I'll be fine
5.
All of the leaves have fallen Buried beneath the snow They’d dig themselves all out but There’s nowhere for them to go The birds rest on the branches Black knots in a string of grey They sing a song of sadness Then they’re on their way Wintersad Wintersad I don’t think that I’ve ever had the blues this bad Wintersad Wintersad God has sent the cold to test me All of my life I’ve waited For someone to impress me My spirit elevated by A kind woman who’ll undress me Some girls co-operated ’Til they danced on to others Their hearts are dead and empty How can they stand as lovers? Wintersad Wintersad I don’t think that I’ve ever had the blues this bad Wintersad Wintersad There is no one left to love me All of your decorations Boxed up beneath the stair Some bright and some are broken They will stay waiting there A string of lights above me Beneath me just a chair I pray to god to guide me Release me into the air Wintersad Wintersad Won’t somebody try to stop me Wintersad Wintersad Even god reneges on taking me to his hand
6.
So you’re sitting there at home With an AM radio And the oldies station on So you’re not alone You know you can’t compare With the sounds out of thin air And it really isn’t fair That nobody seems to care You’re turning 30 And you feel dirty You’re wondering what you’ve done To deserve me You know it’s not your fault But nonetheless you’re caught In a well of deep despair With someone who thinks he cares I wrote this song It’s pretty simple I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry Once I made you strong Now I make you miserable And I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry Please baby forgive me for all of my sins I promise I’ll do better when I do them again I never know what not to say Always give it all away So you’re laying in bed alone Watching fresh fallen snow With the ghosts of Christmas past So you’re not alone When will you find a way to live just for today Not some future distant star To shine on who you are Not some future distant star To shine on who you are Not some future distant star To shine on who you are I wrote this song It’s pretty stupid I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I know I was wrong There I said it before you did And I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry Please baby forgive me that’s all I can plead And that’s the only present left that I still need I never know what not to say Always give it all away
7.
8.
Let It Snow 02:07
9.

about

It’s kind of SOP marketing to make a “holiday” record these days, but TBH I didn’t realize I was making this album until I was making this album. I think it does have a couple of the best songs I’ve ever written, so there.

Grayson Currin of the Independent Weekly wrote a very nice if lengthy interview feature about this record that probably explains a lot:
www.indyweek.com/indyweek/the-bryk-house/Content?oid=1200167

credits

released November 27, 2006

Played and recorded by Bryk at Flabby Road 3: Rise of the Machines, Raleigh NC. Mastered by Jeff Carroll at Bluefield.

With late game assists by Erin McGinn, Jim Brantley*, Tad Dreis, Tim Carless, Morgan David, and Down By Avalon (Alan Martin, Dempsey Elks and David Needham).

*If you prefer your Christmas Music to be of the joyous variety, we highly recommend checking out Jim's family band! thebrantleyfamilyband.bandcamp.com

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Some rights reserved. Please refer to individual track pages for license info.

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dan bryk Durham, North Carolina

That guy who wrote “Chunky Girl” and “Discount Store.”

Now dropping hoarded tracks like sucka MCs.

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