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The Next Best Thing

from Pop Psychology by Dan Bryk

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"welcome to the show, welcome to the psycho circus."

SWM, 34, w/o self esteem ISO a nervous breakdown. no fatties.


tell us doctor what’s the boy’s prognosis
advanced case of pop psychosis
he thought the best songs came by osmosis
not from running round the yard like your pet neurosis

you’re second guessing has he gotten too chubby
can we still sell it as cute and cuddly
this messy business gets him all ornery and grumpy
though we’ve cornered the market on girls so chunky

(he’s) always looking for the next big thing
when he could settle for the next best thing

i bet you’re thinking that i’m too defensive
overwrought and self-reflexive
all you ever do is give and give and
you can’t help wondering if i’m too expensive

i know you’re wishing i would be more patient
cute and quirky and bored complacent
it’s not like anybody’s waiting for my gay shit
so i’d better sit tight and wait for my paycheque

(you’re) always looking for the next big thing
when you could settle for the next best thing

while they’re tying up the tiny talent
they were busy burying miss balint
their good intentions keeping my muse quiet
cause i’ve still got the right to be silent

when they wonder why i get so nervous
airing my laundry to the weak and curious
i know it’s really just a public service
supplying the freakshow to the circus

i’m always looking for the next big thing
when they i could settle for the next best thing


from Pop Psychology, released June 9, 2009
josh hicks: drums
maury lafoy: bass
chris warren: acoustic guitar
kurt swinghammer: lap steel, electric guitars
sarah mcelcheran: trumpet
rj satchithananthan: trombone




Dan Bryk Durham, North Carolina

That guy who wrote “Chunky Girl” and “Discount Store.”

Finally dropping new songs almost as good as those

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